Dudley's Worst Fears
by Dandelion Cat
Summary: Anyone ever wonder what kind of mental torture Dudley went through when he was attacked by the dementors? Reminder: This is supposed to be HUMOR.


Dudley's Worst Fears

Disclaimer: No, I do not own Harry Potter.

_Everything is so cold. What's happening!?_

"W-what are you d-doing? St-stop it Harry!"

"I'm not doing anything! Shut up and don't move!" My cousin growled.

_Liar!_ I thought._ I'm not so stupid that I can't tell that he's the one responsible for making this place feel like Antarctica in the middle of summer!_

Suddenly, everything was dark and I let out a scream of terror. I yelled at Harry, threatening to hit him if he didn't lift the spell. When he didn't comply, I punched him as hard as I could. It felt like I hit him in the side of the head. Then, I started running. I heard Harry scream at me to stop, but I ignored him. I wasn't going to let him have his way. This was all just a stupid joke. A stupid, scary, terrifying joke.

Unexpectedly, I felt even colder than before and strange visions flashed before my eyes.

_I was sitting alone in a dark, cold room. I looked around for a way out, but when I finally saw the door, I found that I couldn't move. Just then, a little girl came walking in sucking on a lolly-pop._

"_Do you want a cookie?" She asked pleasantly. I stared at her, confused. She batted her eyes, her expression sweet and innocent._

"Uh, yeah._"_

"_TOO BAD, THIS IS MY COOKIE!!" She shouted, waving a gigantic chocolate-chip cookie in front of my face. I could feel the drool coming out of the side of my mouth. Then, she pulled out an enormous basket of candy that she'd had hidden behind her back._

"_You know you want some." She taunted in a sweet, sinister voice._

"_HAND OVER THE CANDY!!" I yelled as the little girl laughed demonically. She then proceeded to slowly unwrap a candy bar. My eyes widened in horror as she deliberately brought it towards her mouth – and took a bite!_

"_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"_

_The torture continued until, suddenly, the door swung open and my parents walked into the room. I grinned; now the little girl would pay!_

"_Mom! Dad! That little girl won't give me any candy!" I whined. To my surprise, neither of them did anything._

_Looking nervous, my mother began to speak, avoiding my gaze. _

"_Diddy – sweetheart; your father and I have decided to send you to boot camp. We have finally realized that you are . . . well – __**fat**__. So we're enrolling you at a facility where your food intake will be monitored and you will be helped with your weight problem. It will be fun! You'll run 4 miles each day with all of your new friends at camp!" (AN: *snorts* I've run far more in one day than that!)_

_I was horrified; it was as though my worst nightmare had come to life! Abruptly, the door slammed open and a bunch of soldiers ran into the room._

"_Holy crap, that boy's fat! I'll bet he's one of the biggest we've had yet!" One of them practically shouted. I glowered at him, wishing I could move and teach him a lesson in pain. Speaking of which, why couldn't I move? I struggled to get up, but my body didn't respond._

"_Get him up and out of here!" The commander ordered. Two of the soldiers grabbed me by my arms and hauled me to my feet, grumbling about how much I weighed._

"_I DON'T WANNA GO! I DON'T WANNA GOOOOOOO!!" I screamed as I was dragged through the doorway._

All of a sudden, everything was dark. I could feel the coldness of the concrete against my skin, causing me to shiver. When I went to wrap my arms around myself for warmth, I discovered that they were clamped over my head. Odd. Just a moment ago, I was being dragged away.

Someone was shaking me, telling me to get up. I wanted to comply, but, for some reason, I couldn't get my body to work. I felt someone haul me to my feet and, in a daze, I managed to open my eyes.

I was greeted by the sight of my cousin supporting me, but didn't say a thing as we started moving forward. I was too numb and exhausted to care.

* * *

There was never a more welcome sight than home. By now, I'd decided that it had all been a dream. A horrible, bone-chilling dream. After the horrors I'd had to face, having my parents fussing over me was exactly what I needed.

But the first thing I wanted was a giant chocolate sundae with **two** cherries on top!

* * *

**This is my first time attempting humor, so please review and tell me what you think! (seriously, humor is not my thing, so I need to know how I did)**

**Thanks! :)**


End file.
